Saturday, April 30, 2011

my joyful noise

she
my wife
rock star
super model
joker
friend

she
my wife
sassy
funny
exciting
funky chick

she
my wife
inspires
encourages
challenges
brings out the best

she
my wife
blue eyes
killer smile
sensitive soul
warming spirit

she
my wife
oozing confidence
spirited enthusiasm
brutal honesty
my joyful noise

Sunday, April 17, 2011

someone like you


challenges. we all know them. we all face them. we all live through them. the way you come out on the other side is determined by your attitude. you can either come out the other side stronger or weaker. we are faced with choices daily that determine the path and how our short life story will play out. the same when it comes to your past and your memories of it. we like to dwell in the past. we listen to songs of broken hearts and broken relationships. of things lived and lost. to stand still and re-live those moments. however - i recently decided to rather focus on my future and painting new memories of my future. the future that i will share with my beautiful wife. the partner i have chosen to share the rest of my life with. modern day life has set us up! i was one of its biggest victims. it wants us to stand still in the past. it tries to cripple us with memories of pain. memories of failure. memories of what could have been but never will be. it slowes us down to live life. it steals from the joys that awaits us around every corner. instead we live life looking over our shoulder. music. movies. all forms of entertainment these days speak to that dark side we carry around inside of us. it speaks and stirs our darkest emotions that wants to run back to that place of empty promises and lost opportunities. BUT NOT ME. i am looking forward. anticipating the fabulous future. spending every moment with the love of my life. sharing crazy situations. deepest secrets. creating memories that will stand for eternity. moments that will last for a lifetime. i am glad i found someone like you. the one next to whom i will wake up next to for as long as i live. the one with the big blues eyes and fair skin. the one that makes me laugh. the one that keeps me sane. the one that i can trust and confide in. i can tell you everything. i want to. i have to. cos we are one. and will always be.

Monday, April 11, 2011

emotional masochism


we have all been there. emotional masochism. once in your lifetime. it was the bread on your butter. the bitter with your sweet. the pity at your party. i just finished reading a book that made me realize how pathetic we can be. i listened to a sermon about the power of our thoughts and that the battle rages in our minds, thoughts and emotions. a mind siege. all of us have built relationships on memories. perceptions of feelings. we have put ourselves through endless weeks and months of misery. all based on a thought. an emotion. that connection you thought you had – all in the mind. imagination. trying to figure out what it was that you were feeling. trying to come to terms with your emotions. when it was all lies that your mind was selling you. and you fell for it. hook line. and sinker. so i was wondering why we do this. and emotional masochisms was the answer that i came up with. feeling sorry for yourself and dwelling on the pain. feeding off it. it comes from our introspective selfish nature as humans. its all about me. once you turn your focus outward - fears, feelings and emotions of this kind becomes a vapor in the wind. don’t underestimate the power of your mind. or the control of your emotions over your rational. people go crazy because they don’t understand this about themselves. they merely brush it aside and say: its only thoughts. but your thoughts become patterns in your life that in turn becomes actions and then habits. therefore program your mind not to dwell on these thoughts of self-inflicted pain. rather live a life of freedom. free from negative and painful thoughts. longing for a place of false safety that you have created in your mind. walk away. do it today. it is not worth turning back to. if you are honest with yourself right now – you don’t really want that which you crave in your mind. you would rather enjoy the freedom from it.